The goal of the Relational Peace technique is to cut the attachment bonds you no longer need. The Young Me is constantly creating bonds, more or less useful, with the people, events and objects around it, but rarely sorts through them. A bit like your old raincoat that’s been hanging on its hook since your teenage years, some bonds remain even though they no longer serve you for anything except cluttering up your relational closet.

Every person you meet stirs up different emotions in you. Each one awakens quite distinct resonances. Attachment bonds, conscious and unconscious, mark out your life journey, weigh down your relationships with others, influence your choices and feed some of your repetitive patterns. These bonds also exist in your relationships with the people you love deeply.

This technique brings the detachment and perspective needed to calmly cultivate healthy relationships. In fact, making peace within your bonds by no means means abandoning the other person or no longer loving them. It simply means removing what no longer works in your bonds to make more room for the positive aspects of your relationships. The metaphorical image of a newborn is quite fitting here. During pregnancy, the bond of the umbilical cord is vital. Yet at birth, it becomes just as crucial to cut that same cord so the newborn can fully take their place as a little human being. And cutting that cord will not make their parents love them any less. Quite the opposite.

The Relational Peace technique also opens the door to forgiving what weighs down a relationship. Forgiveness here involves two essential phases: self-forgiveness and forgiving the other person. This process of forgiveness is essential for shedding your regrets, your guilt or your anger, whether more or less conscious. It lets you lighten a burden and regain your freedom within that relationship. Forgiving the other person is done with the aim of feeling better yourself. Forgiveness is a liberating act that lets pain dissolve and lets you become the actor of your own life again, no longer just enduring it, becoming stronger. Forgiveness is therefore a choice you make for yourself, for your well-being. Making relational peace lets you keep only the good, keep only the love.

Since forgiveness liberates, it is healthy to make peace with everyone in order to extend its benefits. You can adapt the technique depending on the type of relationship you want to work on:

Living people you love (children, friends, a partner, etc.) Relational Peace here helps avoid the buildup of resentment or disappointed expectations. It helps heal the relationship, strengthen its foundations and start fresh.

People who have passed away (recently or long ago, loved or not) In order to free yourself from the repercussions of that loss in your life and to preserve a healthy, light memory.

Neutral people (neither loved nor disliked, such as your coworkers or an unpleasant server). To lighten, or to improve, the overall atmosphere in your life. To avoid passing resentments caused by poor communication in the moment.

Present or past enemies (attackers, harassers, manipulators, reckless drivers on the road, etc.)

Relational Peace fosters a process of deeply reclaiming your existence and helps you start fresh on solid foundations.

This technique is described in the context of guiding a third party. In self-hypnosis, follow the steps while guiding yourself.

Bring the person to a safe place (near the tree, for example)

Bring in the person with whom the guided person wishes to make peace.

Suggest that, even if they don’t appear clearly, one or more bonds do indeed exist between them. Find this concrete bond that links the person to the other. If needed, use spray paint or magic powder to make the bond visible. The person can also ask one of their allies to show it to them. Note that this bond can appear in any form (wood, chain, rainbow, vine, thread, light, etc.)

Have them describe the bond. What is its texture, size, shape, strength, etc.?

Also have them describe how this bond is connected to the body. Which part of the body is it attached to?

Take the time to really let this bond be felt and make the conscious choice to move into the forgiveness step. Depending on the situation (living or deceased, loved or hated, etc.), forgiveness may seem more difficult. You’ll then need to use imagination, strategy and conviction to have the two essential phases spoken clearly, that is, self-forgiveness and forgiving the other. Don’t hesitate to put up an indestructible wall between the guided person and the person they hate, or to have them put on a cloak of invisibility; the protection of one or more of your allies is also possible. If needed, use the Scanner technique to relieve emotional heaviness before forgiving, or free the words if something seems stuck in the throat.

• Now have them say out loud: · “I forgive you (for myself).”

The “for myself” is used in the case of forgiving someone who is hated.

Reminder: if Relational Peace is done with an abuser, move through it quickly. Likewise, take all the time you need if it’s a loved one. Since removing the bond doesn’t change the love, you might as well take the time to enjoy it.

Have them remove what remains of the bond, and check whether the removed bond left any particular marks. If so, invite the person to apply something soothing (magic ointment, cool water, star powder…)

Option: have them exchange light or a gift with the person if it’s a loved one.

Then offer the most beautiful imaginary gift possible, and make sure to receive a generous gift in return.

Option: in the guided person’s inner world, have them place the person with whom they cut the bond in the right place.